yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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