Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize