Don't you send me to vm
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I smell like Dick and happiness
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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