I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
