So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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