i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
