you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
