"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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