I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
soo... how was my night?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
