bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize