I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
