No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
it was like eating out sand paper
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
