Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
