I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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