perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
