Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Randomize
