Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
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