I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
