am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize