So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
