i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
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