No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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