Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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