I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
