It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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