Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
