Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
sex in a hospital.. check
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
