You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
