i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
