He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
