You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm always down for nudity.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize