Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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