I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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