if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
You smell like stripper and shame
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
