Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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