dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
