Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
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