Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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