wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
organizing the empties. That sober.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
