Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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