did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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