Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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