at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
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