Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
