Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
