take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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