spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
