i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize