Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
