Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
