You're so nebulous sometimes
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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