I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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